I never quite felt like blogging was my world, so imagine my surprise when I realized that I missed it. It’s been two years since my last dip in the blog-pool, but here I am, swirling my toes in the water. The trouble is, I still can’t narrow my focus. I have too many interests and too many opinions to blog about just one topic so I’ve decided to continue blogging about what’s on my mind in the hopes of finding many circles and continuing many conversations. My problem? After two years, where do you start?
I asked twitter what to discuss in the first blog of my grand return. My boyfriend jokingly responded with “how amazing life is with your amazing boyfriend.” While that was a joke, I do feel that I should briefly address where I am now (and he does play a major role).
My last post was written during a time of my deepest depression. In truth, all of my posts were written with a slate-grey cloud hovering overhead, however the last one was brought to you during my spiral into rock bottom. The guilt I carried with me the last time I shared my personal life with you was so heavy that I hated myself, but today, my mental state is the best it has ever been, and dare I say, I’m actually happy. In the last 2 years, I have learned to accept myself as-is, curbed my depression, and allowed myself the freedom to step away from being a caregiver. Combined, those things have allowed me to meet a great man, move away from the things that were holding me back, and start a new career.
Last we spoke, grandpa was in the hospital and I felt that it was every bit my fault. Today, grandpa is alive and well at age 97, living in a very nice nursing home and getting the qualified care that he deserves. I am living with my amazing boyfriend 135 miles away and feeling completely at home. There was some guilt when I first moved, but I’ve overcome that now and I still visit, get updates, and video chat. I am living my life in the way I was meant to and I absolutely believe that grandpa would be proud. (I know it sounds like I’m referring to him here as if he is no longer with us, but he isn’t aware enough to understand or retain new information that we tell him.)
Two years ago, I would have never imagined that upon leaving Ball State, I would temp at an international publishing house, then leave Indiana and become a long-term temp for one of Forbes top 5 most desirable companies, but that is where this path has brought me. As it turns out, that “useless” creative writing degree isn’t so useless. I now work as a technical writer, I enjoy my job, and I’ve discovered through it that I am capable of learning things I thought to be outside my wheelhouse. That in and of itself is a constant blessing, but it also pays the bills.
So here I am, in a new state, with a new mindset, on a new career path, living with my self-proclaimed amazing boyfriend (he kind of is), and ready to get back to the thing that got me through those dark years. It is time to renew my devotion to writing and learn with, and from all of you. Nothing is off limits, so tell me, what’s next?